Recap April 8, 2006

WEATHER: Couldn't have been better. Sunny, clear, slight breeze, near 70. Ideal football weather. A great turnout that saw us play nearly three hours.

GAME: Back and forth early, Dark took control and went up 30-20. Then White's defensive coordinator, JP, left and Dark was held scorless the rest of the way as Jim took over. White scored six consecutive TDs and won 62-30.

I happily called JP with this news and, being the talented lawyer he is, put forth a good rebuttal. He pointed out that Zach also had to leave, which took away Dark's fastest player. A fair point. But the jury bought my argument for why White excelled in JP's absence. It's the novel ABS legal theory – Addition By Subtraction.

PLAYERS OF THE GAME, OFFENSE: Rory was excellent, scoring three touchdowns and catching virtually everything thrown his way. His best was a superb effort on a deep pass that he caught in stride over a defender, then kept his feet and eluded two tacklers in the end zone. … I'm giving myself the second nod. White scored on 10 of 11 drives and had no turnovers. Plus, I had to deal with both JP AND Anthony on my team, TO Squared.

DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE GAME: Brent gets the nod with his five sacks. Sure, he did get called for bull rushing once and tomahawk-chopped Anthony's arm when he Qbed, but he did a terrific job overall.

WARDROBE MALFUNCTION: Anthony had another pair of shorts ripped, this time by Zach who grabbed for his flag and came up with a piece of cloth instead. We had to delay the game a bit as Anthony, as one player said, "was changing his skirt."

TIP DRILL: Nice job on the game's only interception as Anthony deflected the pass into the waiting arms of Rory.

QB RATING TIME: Mike played a bit of QB for White and completed 2 of 3 passes for 70 yards, 1 TD and 0 interceptions. That translates to a 149 rating (perfect is 158.3 but I made sure he wouldn't obtain that by dropping the only pass thrown to me!).

WIDE OPEN BUT: We had several busted plays where receivers got wide open … and promptly dropped the pass. But Dark did score on one such play on a nice pass from Marino to Dan ("Marino Dan." Like that!).

DULY NOTED: A few plays that didn't count but are still worth mentioning. Zach made a great leaping grab along the back of the end zone but came out of bounds by a foot. … Cody made a great grab in the corner of the end zone, with one foot in and one touching the cone. Dark ruled the cone was the first foot, so denied Cody the catch. … Bubba had his first interception in ages taken away on a legit defensive holding call on the other side of the field.

OUCH: I've learned to not do a hard leg workout on Thursday, play nearly three hours of football on Saturday, then get in my car and spend 45 minutes in traffic. I finally got out of my car at the speed of a 175-year-old tortoise that has just taken Ambien.

BEST EXCUSE FOR MISSING LAST WEEK: Rory – "I was in London."

WORST EXCUSE FOR MISSING LAST WEEK: JB and Mike: "We looked out and thought it was raining." Said of a day where we needed sunscreen.

GOOD LINES: "Brent carries the ball like he's carrying a preemie." Anyone who has seen Brent run with the ball knows what it means. … "Wadda mean good defense? The ball hit me in the hands and I dropped it." – JB about Mike.

CALL A SURVEYOR: We kept having disagreements on ball spots, some of which were quite humorous. My favorite was when one Dark receiver caught the ball and fell backwards … and the ball was promptly spotted 5 yards forward by his teammates; I think you can only defy the laws of physics on "The Matrix."

HIGHLIGHTS: Marino was on all day, with many nice tosses and play calls. His favorite was a nice hard slant to JB that hit him in stride for a big gain. … Zach made a nice move in getting a step on Rory and beating him to the ball for a score. … The longest shovel pass of the day went to Peter, who rumbled about 30 yards before finally being caught. …

Kudos to David, who always stays home on defense, is an excellent flag-grabber and reliable receiver. … Two great routes by Patrick for scores – one on a slant, then pivot to the corner; the other on a great stop and go that froze the defender. … Dan had a solid game at receiver, including one nice long pass for a score. … Easiest score of the day was on a post to Anthony. White stacked the right side and Dark left Anthony in single coverage and left the inside wide open. … Anthony joined Rory with 3 TDs on the day. … Nifty move and catch for a score by JP, who managed to keep his feet in bounds while falling. … Nice MLB by Bubba, who twice knocked passes away on fourth down.